Gabriel's shared items

Sunday, May 18, 2008

void

argh. d4m|\| |-||-|.

Monday, May 12, 2008

The mystery of consciousness

what constitutes a consciousness? can consciousness be divided into components? where does this consciousness exist? what is an observer? is a consciousness necessarily implicated in an observation?

two intriguing phenomena associated with consciousness:
- that it routinely ceases when we sleep, and is able to come back on again. Is death simply a cessation of consciousness, and could it come back on again?
- this unreliable thing we base much judgment on - our memories. so unreliable yet so real.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

"Exploits of a mom"



Found this website on facebook. lol.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Pride, and responsibility.

An excerpt from downing college's 2006 yearbook...

Every year when the examination results are published members of the Governing Body initially, and then the Education Committee, examine the results carefully to identify trends and strengths and weaknesses. It might be asked why we do this. It is partly due to a personal responsibility which we all feel following our own decisions to admit these students. But our sense of responsibility extends beyond whether we made the right decision, but extends to whether the potential which we initially identified, sometimes nearly two years before matriculation, has been fulfilled. Sometimes this is called ‘value-added’. This is a demeaning phrase, but one which has a core truth. For that is our purpose as an educational institution, to ensure that, by the environment we provide and the supervisions we give and the personal interaction with our students, we can show that we have added value to their Cambridge experience.


How I wished my college government had a similar creed. Instead of viewing mathmos as cash cows with no need for attention and maintenance.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Orbitury - Bike no.1.

Today saw the last straw... finally decided to retire my ol' bike when the back wheel spindle gave way on the way back from the cavendish. Invest in a new bike, got one with a lock for 90 pounds today. instead of a replacement wheel which would have cost me 15 pounds.

Spent quite a bit on this bike recently - 20 pounds for a new tire and inner tube, 5 pounds on new brake pads which i fitted myself. think bought it from alvin for 80 pounds initially. Served me 2.5 years. other things breaking down - screws sticking out from seat, making a hole in my pants; front wheel rim's been dented, causing the front breaks to be jerk to a stop when it meets the dent; someone attempted to cut my lock before, leaving it slightly breached.

Initially hoped to maintain this bike til the end of the year, and get a new bike when i return next year, so that I wont have to leave a new bike here over summer, when it deteriorates lots. but it looks like the bike's broken down much faster than I had hoped. Hope that this bike can last me the next year, or more, if I stayed here longer.

Here's to the memory of my first bike in cambridge...

Monday, April 14, 2008

More Musings

For final year Cambridge students, the Easter holidays are a time when studying for the tripos becomes the de facto activity. Surfing for news, and other forms of entertainment, also increases in frequency as it happens to be the most convenient way to regenerate study manna in the occurrence of study fatigue.

It feels like lately, the news has been dominated by stories of soaring grain/food, oil and gold/commodities prices; and of the gloomy outlook of US and British economies.

Just felt the urge to take some time off my work to consolidate some thoughts amidst this barrage of bleak news.

On food shortages
I recall a time when the world had too much food and farmers were paid to let their land lie fallow [EU 'Set-aside' policy, 1988; China, 2000]. Since then, I've had the impression that modern technology had led to the eradication of food shortages, and that the lack of food in isolated parts of the world (and by the poor) was simply a socio-economic problem stemming from uneven distribution of wealth, and not lack of actual food supplies.

So when I read the reports of increasing food prices due to shortages, I wondered where my original perception stood in light of these reports. Found the above links, and this press release from the European Commission, upon some googling.

Conclusion: it is indeed the case that our food supply is falling short of demand, and that this reversal in trend happened only as recent as last fall. And this has led to the nullification of the 'Set-aside' policy.

[A slightly unrelated link]

On food and oil

With oil prices rising relentlessly, it seems the strain on the food supply might be due to the switch to biofuels as an alternative source of energy.

Recall watching on the news back home an incident about a run on the supermarket for palm oil in Malaysia. Googled for 'Malaysia palm oil rush', and found a more recent incident.

Biofuels are also being made out of grain. And according to the article, if all the corn produced in the US were used to replace oil, it can only offset gasoline consumption by 15%. So it looks like there is enough food to fill our stomachs, but way too little to use on our fuel tanks too.

Even though it encroaches on our food supplies, the use of biofuels actually still seems very appealing - if only the mix of technology and economic pressures would turn desert wastelands that have too much sunshine into palm oil plantations that converted the sunlight and carbon dioxide into fuel which we burn directly, we could bypass the redundant process of turning plants into fossil fuels when we burn them for fuel. Furthermore, what is the point of trying to solve fusion containment problems, plus figuring out how to extract the energy produced from the exceedingly hot reaction, when all we have to do is figure out the latter from our ready source of fusion energy - our sun, which is conveniently contained by it's own gravitational field?

[I recall in Pri 1, asking my teacher a similar question when I encountered two seemingly incompatible facts - why does Singapore, being an island surrounded by water, face water problems? The answer was that the water we were surrounded by wasn't potable (shame). Well, with technology, we have now made sea water potable. Hopefully, in the same way, technology could render today's hostile deserts cultivatable for biofuel producing crops.]


On oil and gold

Just trying to put the recent record gold prices in perspective.

On 2.67
I'm getting tired. I'll just let this article speak for itself :P

Also reading about the desperate situation the poor in Singapore are facing. Giving the excuse that such a topic is off limits for a Singaporean is probably a good way conclude this entry.

Lastly, a more far fetched speculation
Revelation 6

The Seals


1I watched as the Lamb opened the first of the seven seals. Then I heard one of the four living creatures say in a voice like thunder, "Come!" 2I looked, and there before me was a white horse! Its rider held a bow, and he was given a crown, and he rode out as a conqueror bent on conquest.

3When the Lamb opened the second seal, I heard the second living creature say, "Come!" 4Then another horse came out, a fiery red one. Its rider was given power to take peace from the earth and to make men slay each other. To him was given a large sword.

5When the Lamb opened the third seal, I heard the third living creature say, "Come!" I looked, and there before me was a black horse! Its rider was holding a pair of scales in his hand. 6Then I heard what sounded like a voice among the four living creatures, saying, "A quart of wheat for a day's wages, and three quarts of barley for a day's wages, and do not damage the oil and the wine!"



With that, i'm off to rest my head (on the pillow :P)

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Summer plans

As the holidays ebb ever so quickly away, and the exams of Easter term loom near, so too are my plans for summer beginning to take shape.

Am trying to cram two major activities into my finite timetable this summer - a 6 week volunteer program to China (ISEC), and an 8 week internship at DSI.

The dates are more or less confirmed, and will be booking the air ticket soon.

June 17: Flying home from UK
June 18-27: Will try to clock a few days at work at DSI, but also need some time to prepare for the trip to china.
June 28 - Aug 7: ISEC.
Aug 7 - Aug 12: Visiting CK gugu and Ling in Shanghai. (Anyone reading this who happens to be free during this time and wants to tour Shanghai too, pls get in touch! :)
Aug 12 - Oct 3: Will be trying to clock another 7 weeks at DSI, and catching up with everyone!

Bracing myself for one hectic summer! And looking forward to accomplishing much. But first, the tripos :S

Musings
The pound hit fresh lows against the sg dollar - now 1 gbp is now worth 2.67 sgd! Need to buy my air tickets in dollars!

Monday, April 07, 2008

Back!

from switzerland...

Good getaway, a fitting pilgrimage for a physicist, to be undertaken once in the course of an undergraduate physicist's life...

Visited eisteinhaus (the house where Einstein lived) in Bern, and Cern in Geneva. Saw the Atlas experiment, the tunnel, the computing facility containing a huge server farm where the data from the experiment is processed, and where the web originated.

Also, switzerland has these very interesting playgrounds filled with very innovative toys (will try to post pics of the toys when i find the time)... no wonder they produce such geniuses!

For now, it's back to the books... Hope I'm more inspired from the visit :D

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Off to Switzerland!

Heading off to the land overflowing with chocolate in a whiles time, to see Einstein's patent office in Bern and the Large Hadron Collider in Geneva.

Here's my and will be contactable on my sg number.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Flashback to the 90's - Tiny Toons!

Found these retarded cartoons quite therapeutic to engage in in between periods of mugging...





...that's how it all begun :P

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

The climax of Romans

Did Romans 11:33-36 during focus today. Doxology arising from the case of our salvation that Paul expounded upon up to that point (Romans chapter 1 - 11).

A doxology (from the Greek doxa, glory + logos, word or speaking) is a short hymn of praise to God in various Christian worship services, often added to the end of canticles, psalms, and hymns. The tradition derives from a similar practice in the Jewish synagogue.


Chapter 1-4: We are justified by grace through faith, not by our effort.
Chapter 5-8: Christ has conquered sin, to give us life.
Chapter 9-11: God has chosen us to be saved, and to share in Israel's blessings.

It was when the summery of the first 11 chapters of Romans was written out explicitly on the board did the meaning of the subsequent verses, the verses in chapter 12, fully hit me.

Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God - this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not be conformed any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - His good, pleasing and perfect will.
- Romans 12:1-2


Was first convicted of the verse around sec 3, when examining what it really meant to worship God. I never really understood why the verse started with the word 'therefore', had seen it simply as a posh literary device, and i hardly thought more about what the words 'in view of God's mercy' were referring to. But today, having covered the book of Romans til this climax, I finally understand the train of argument, and that worship is a response to the entire circumstance that lead to our salvation.

So much for focus today.

Random Aside
I'm now addicted to salty snacks - machos, chips, and sweet drinks - coke, apple juice!

OWNED!

for some reason, i find the following series of pictures gravely hilarious:



i am so evil.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

oh crap... (Another shitty medical account)

quite literally. liquid crap.

not sure what i did to myself to induce this round of diarrhoea.

been evacuating water from my a*** all morning today. it's similar to the side effects i experienced when i downed 2 pints of milk at a go, except this time it has nothing to do with excess lactose.

Might possibly attribute the cause to eating crab sticks straight from the chopping board without cooking it, felt my hygiene conscience pricking when i did that, but before the foolishness of the action fully dawned upon to me, i had already consumed a whole handful of unsanitized crab sticks. found my stool getting softer over the week, culminating in this morning's episode.

Consulting a 4th year medic now over msn for diagnosis and possible treatment.

Treatment: just let the effects run it's course, and hydrate frequently to replenish excreted water.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Earthquake!

been blogging sparely the since i returned this year. After spending more than 2 years here, one rarely experiences anything new anymore...

...until yesterday...

thought i'd better update here to reassure everyone back home that i'm fine, and relate my own experience of the earthquake - the first time i had ever experienced one.

It was a very subtle sensation. Was lying on my bed, trying to fall asleep, when i felt the vibrations. recall wondering two thoughts that night...

"why does my bed feel like a massage chair? what's making it so unstable?" thought that my bed had suddenly became unstable, and i was somehow causing it to rock.

and
"which part of me was involuntarily shaking?" had thought it an interesting experience to be aware that i was shaking, yet not being able to pinpoint its exact origin.

The thoughts didn't last, and i soon found my conciousness returning to battle my receding slumber time.

I only found out the next morning that i had experienced an earthquake when sei mentioned it at lectures. found it quite amusing... other people recounted that it felt like a hallucination, and i thought that i would pass the experience off as that had i not found out that it was an earthquake.

Other Updates
speaking of sei, we'll be travelling to geneva on a weekend trip (4-7 Apr) to see the LHC!!! Would prob be spending the rest of the holidays mugging :(

Also, it's season of renewal here in cambridge... This time, I've relinquished my position on the temasek society com, to assume the position of treasurer in the cf com. Good opportunity to serve God, now having tasted what secular cambridge has to offer. Hoping to make it on isec this year too, just returned from the interview. It's strange how i'm actually so comfortable with being focused on serving God, without feeling like i'm missing out on anything outside.

yep, that's about it. I'm in one piece, and hope everyone back home is well too! :) Grace! sam! blog about cny leh... :P

Sunday, February 24, 2008

hindsight

an old email sent to my home cg when i was newly posted to 46 SAR...


Hi, I feel the need to share my experience of being posted to 46 SAR with someone, both for the purpose of unloading my burden, and hopefully to edify (i don't know if it would) the people who hear it.

Last time in cell we when we shared about our week, I used to take it as time to break the ice, probably just to create conversation. Though I knew that it was supposed to be a time of sharing GOD's goodness so that we may glorify GOD and edify each other, and that it was a time we learnt of each other's problems and support each in prayer. But for a very long time, I never really had any problems and never really needed to depend on GOD, thus I never really needed prayer. That's why I never took such sharing seriously, and never thought much of other people's problems. But right now, I feel the need to share. Hopefully this mail would be like one of the 'how was your week' sharing.

In the past month, since my posting to 46 SAR, I've experienced a lot of (i would think) trials. I'll get to that later, maybe I'll narrate the events leading to my posting to give a better idea of the background.

Since I enlisted, I've been feeling that what I was going through was unneccessary, a waste of my time. I hated being made to do things I do not like to do, tasks which I deemed not worthy of my effort. In BMT, and even SMM (school of Military Medicine), each time I went through something tough, I fought it by trying to get each tough time (you may consider it trials) over and done with, by looking forward to the end: a bookout and eventually passing out of the school. i held on to the hope that I'd be posted somewhere good, perhaps even my old unit, I thought there was light at the end of the tunnel. Also, throughout my time there, I found my worth, and tried to counter the frustration that i was wasting my time by furthering my knowledge in certain areas, which was the way i've found satisfaction since my school days. In fact, I was rather successful in furthering my knowledge in programming in SMM. I met someone with the same interest, and there was some kind of synergy. My trophy when I left SMM was a minesweeper solver which we created in vb... (sorry, that's besides the point). But in order to satisfy myself this way, I needed to book out of camp regularly, and have sufficient free time in camp to work on the problems. Something which I will not have in 46 SAR.

Then when I was posted to 46 SAR, I was utterly depressed (probably every single person posted here experiences a period of depression). I did not know how to live with the prospect of 36 hours of book out time a week, minus the travel time to and from sungai gedong, and time I would need to rest and recuperate from the hectic training, and all the time to prepare to book in. The feeling was like that of someone pinning me down, such that there was no point struggling. That was when I learnt to stop struggling, maybe it was because I had resigned to my fate. But I had no choice but to let go of those things that I had found satisfaction in. Had I held on to it, the frustration of not being able to accomplish anything would be unbearable, killing. At the same time, I begun to realised that it was a time of trial, a refining process. Recalling the verse in James which we memorised in Sunday school, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." I learnt to see GOD's purpose in my going through these trials and ask HIM for strength to go through it. Perhaps it was because I needed to find a reason for me going through it, it is simply too meaningless to go through this all these pain for nothing.

But even (or only) in the midst of all the uncertainty and fear, I was able to experience GOD's grace and mercy from the very first night I stepped into the camp. As I mentioned, the day I was posted to 46 SAR, I was very depressed, fearful of this new, unknown, notorious place. That very night, GOD sent me a very good friend, the son of a pastor, someone whom I've known since primary school and went to secondary school with. He came to see me, and it was such a relief to see someone familiar, a Christian brother. On the second night, he came to see me again, this time while I was sleeping, as he had came back very late from an out field exercise. Imagine what great comfort it is to wake up to the voice of a friend in the midst of such fear and uncertainty, it almost felt as if I had seen an angel!

Another testament of GOD's grace is the people he has put above and around me, I'm not sure how to describe it without going into the details of the hierarchy and stuff. I must thank GOD for granting me favour in the eyes of my superiors. Having said that, I hope that I won't do anything that will cause me to lose that favour. And so far, I've had a lot of time out of camp since I was posted to 46 SAR. First for an exercise, then i had my wisdom teeth extracted and had 1 week's MC, then there was national day, where we got to hang around at the national stadium, and now I have 2 days off for the weekend and national day burnt. However, I still have the feeling that all these are short-lived as National day is over, and i only have one set of 4 wisdom teeth, and that the actual training is about to commence. But I pray and trust that GOD will see me through, in ways I cannot see (though as I say this, I have my doubts too).

I've also learnt other things, think I shall share it some other time, as it is getting quite late. To end off, I have realised the need to rely on GOD, and the need to support each other in GOD. Would especially like to find out how Christopher and Rong Xiang are doing, maybe you would like to share what's been happening... I don't know if this is a kind of fad which will pass, but I hope to learn to constantly support and uphold each other. This is the only thing that is reliable in the midst of all the uncertainties.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Sunday, January 27, 2008

an interesting book

here

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Romans 5

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.
- relationship with God is absolutely secure.
Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.
suffering -> perserverence -> character -> hope.
- suffering is purposeful.
And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
- role of Holy Spirit is to give an experience of God's love, by teaching us the cross.


just some notes from focus tonight... really like the picture illustrating the first point.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Westlife

Hm... chanced upon a televised performance by westlife in the B&B while in the lake district, and found that I really like their songs. Have been watching their clips on youtube...



guess it's because their songs remind me of my jc days...

Recall my class theme song, an excerpt of the lyrics:


Day after day I hear myself say
I'll do my tutorials another day...


but if I let you go I will never know
what my life will be without trigonometry
will I ever see an 'A' for chemistry
how will I know


Are there other nice bands out there? Found watching these performances a good way to destress :)